Friday 27 January 2012

Ode to a Chub

So Leuciscus cephalus
Alias the Chavender
Kissing cousin of carp
Inedible cheese muncher
Thou roving dustbin of the reeds
Thy mouth a gaping maw
Greedy to devour passing
Berries, caterpillars, and moths
All are grist to thy insatiable mill
We send thee tempting snacks
Attached to five pound line
And a size ten hook
Mayhap a slice of banana
Or crusty cube of bread
Thou despiseth not spam;
It is welcomed by thy
Serrated inbox
Catchable in the depths
Of Winter when other
Fish do not bite
Thou art a worthy quarry
From the tiniest brook
To the mightiest river
Thy record is nine pounds
Five ounces at present
Although a larger one
Was caught in Scotland
In nineteen fifty five
And fed to the captor's cat
According to legend;
Redfin bronze scaled
Beauty thy muddy flesh
Tempteth not the palate
Of even the hungriest
Baltic visitor
Curiously thou art
Never found in
Hibernian waters
Perhaps St Patrick
Banished thee
To punish thy
Wonted
Gluttony

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